Forming Constellations
by OxOxEdwardOxOx
Summary: did I really make the right choice? I thought as memories of Edward came flashing in my head. Memories of when he told me he didn’t want to live in a world where I didn’t exist, the time he proposed to me, the many times he saved me, those kisses that mad
1. Chapter 1 Regret

It was 1:22 am, and I lay on my bed just staring at the white ceiling above me

It was 1:22 am, and I lay on my bed just staring at the white ceiling above me. did I really make the right choice? I thought as memories of Edward came flashing in my head. Memories of when he told me he didn't want to live in a world where I didn't exist, the time he proposed to me, the many times he saved me, those kisses that made me faint. I was losing consciousness just thinking about them. Was this really the right path to go? In a way, I wanted to think about them, not caring if those memories or thoughts made me cry, this was the only time that I could cry, the only time when I was truly alone. I loved Jacob, and I didn't want to be without him, it's true, I was in love with him and I don't ever regret that feeling. But just going back to those times and remembering everything that I put Edward through. From the first glance he set on me, refusing to hurt me, to the many times he rescued me from the Volturi, Victoria, and James. But I guess I should give Jacob some credit too, I wouldn't be here if his pack hadn't rescued me from Laurent. As tears came streaming down from my eyes to my cheeks, I didn't bother wiping them away, I just let them drop down and stain my shirt as I closed my eyes and drifted into my dream.

The next morning, I woke up in a really bad mood to the sound of the doorbell. I couldn't remember my dream that last night, but it felt like it was a nightmare. As usual, I put on a smile and headed downstairs to get the door. A natural smile struck my face when I opened the door. It was Jacob holding a bouquet of red roses. He gave me the sweetest look, one that you'd see a man give the love of his life in a romance film. I had butterflies in my stomach, and just when I was about to greet him, he bent down and kissed me softly. It was very gentle and sweet. To any other girl, Jacob would be the perfect guy. And he was perfect to me too, but it felt like there was a part of me he couldn't reach. Jacob knew about my feeling for Edward, and every time Charlie or one of the Quileutes mentioned his name accidentally, I could see that it hurt him even more than it hurt me, and it killed me to see that look on his face, it looked like he was in pain, and every time that happened he was automatically pulling himself closer to me like he was afraid of losing me.  
"Hey, Bells" He said as he pulled away from the kiss.  
"Hey, Jake…" I said back still smiling. When Jake kissed me, it felt like the first time I'd kissed him -- or according to him-- when he said that I had to tell him to kiss me to keep him around. That's when I realized I was in love with him. Remembering that brought back the thought of Edward telling me it was okay to have feelings for Jacob and I could have any part of him I wanted as long as I was happy. That memory brought tears in my eyes that I didn't notice till Jacob's face was suddenly a Blur.  
"Bella, what's wrong?" he said as he put my face in between his big hands "are you okay?"  
I felt so guilty about how I was feeling even though I couldn't control it or do anything about it. Here he was, someone I loved who loved me back, someone who could protect me from danger, someone who would never stop fighting for me no matter what. So why couldn't I get Edward out of my head?  
"It's him again, isn't it?" He asked with his eyes narrowed and his eyebrows bending in together to form that look that hurt me to look at.  
I didn't answer, and I expected him to be mad, or disappointed, or call him a bloodsucker or.. Something. Instead he just put his arms around my waist and pulled me in tightly against his chest. That just made the tears race down even faster. I didn't deserve either of them, how could they both have been so nice to me?  
As we pulled away from the hug, Jacob looked deeply into my eyes like he was trying to read my mind. Then he smiled and kissed my forehead.  
"Look, Bella…" he started off not knowing how to put the words together, as if he wasn't sure he should say what he was about to. "You know that I'm madly in love you right," he continued. "But you don't have any clue what it does to me seeing you like this and knowing that your still in love with him." His voice was getting louder now.  
"No, Jake…" I was starting to object when he cut me off  
"Bella, I thought that if I kept fighting, I would win you someday…" His voice was fading and turning into a whisper now. "I just didn't think of that huge whole he would put in your heart, I guess I just.." I could barely hear him now, and suddenly, his voice went back to normal but in a disappointed tone. "thought I could fill that in." His head hung down as he said that last part. I could almost see the pain through his eyes.  
"Look, as much as it kills me seeing that bloodsucker, it hurts even more seeing you like this" He continued as he lifted his head up to look straight into my eyes. "Maybe we should just…" The words were hard for him to say. "go visit him" It sounded more like a question.  
"Jake!" I yelled not realizing how loud my voice was.  
"It'll be the perfect way to see who's right for you, and if you honestly pick me, then you wont feel like this anymore, and if you pick him," he waited for the moment finding the right words. "Then I'll just be happy that your happy" he said with a slight smile.  
"No, Jake, it'll be weird dropping in on him, believe me, it's a pretty bad idea" I said trying to read his expression  
"We'll just go visit, if it is 'weird'" He paused to put air quotes on weird . "Then we'll just go back and pretend nothing happened" It seemed like he was exited about it.  
Was it just me, or did he want me to go back to Edward?  
"Jake, do you want me to be with Edward?" I asked in a confused tone  
"Oh yes, definitely!" He answered in a sarcastic tone with that smile I loved. "Come on, Bells, you know that's not true" He continued  
"Then why do you want me to go see Edward?" I was surprised at how calm I sounded. "Do you want me to get back together with him, or do you just want to hurt me even more?" I lost the calmness in my voice, now it was just pure anger. "You know what it'll do to me when I see him and then have to leave!" With all that anger, I didn't even realize who I was talking to. I just saw that hurt look on Jacob's face and shook my head in disappointment at myself. I knew how hard it was for Jacob to hear about how I still felt about Edward, and I knew he was just trying to help me. "Jake…" I started still shaking my head slowly. "I'm really sorry…". But Jacob just stood still with that same look still on his face. It was silent for a moment and I couldn't stand it.  
"I know it's going to be hard for you, but do you really think it would be worst than how you're feeling right now?" he broke the silence and I was glad to hear his voice knowing he wasn't too mad at me.  
I Shrugged, which to him was an 'okay' and he just smiled and pressed his lips gently to mine.


	2. Chapter 2 Road Trip

It was 1:22 am, and I lay on my bed just staring at the white ceiling above me

The next morning, I woke up at 6:30 to pack. Jacob said he was picking me up at 7:30 and we would grab breakfast on the way. There aren't words to describe how scared I was at that time. I didn't know what was going to happen, if Edward would be mad at me, if things were going to be awkward again… but I knew I had to face it some time, so I didn't bother thinking about it. When I went to the bathroom to take a shower, right next to the sink, I saw my charm bracelet with the wolf hanging as one charm and the crystal heart hanging as another. It hurt me to look at that every morning, but I just couldn't help but wear it. It felt like if I took the crystal charm off, then it would really be over. When Jacob saw me wearing the bracelet, I just told him that I didn't want to forget about Edward's friendship, But I know he saw through me. After taking my shower, I was a bit more relaxed, until I heard the doorbell knowing it was Jacob. My heart started pounding again, I was scared, but still anxious. I hurried downstairs in my bathrobe and answered the door to see Jacob's confuse and angry look.  
"you're not dressed yet?!" he pretty much yelled it.  
"what's the rush?" I tried to sound calmer than I was. "I was taking my time, but I'll be ready in about ten minutes, I promise." I yelled from up the stairs, but I'm sure he still heard me.  
I already had my outfit picked out and hung over a chair. A red low-cut tank top and a pair of light blue jeans. I wasn't in the mood for running shoes, so I just put on a pair of red flip-flops to match my top. For the time I was going to spend at the hotel while being there, I brought 2 other shirts, a black and pink striped half sleeve, and a white full sleeve incase it got cold. I also brought my favorite black miniskirt to wear with pretty much anything.  
After getting dressed and picking up my suitcase, I looked in my top right shelf to find a piece of paper with the address of Tanya's house where Edward was staying. I came running down the stairs to find Jacob waiting for me at the door. I handed him the address and some money that should cover for the hotel, food and anything else I might need.  
"Bella.." He was starting to refuse when I cut him off.  
"No, Jake, that's fine. You can't keep taking care of me forever." Right after I said that, I wished I hadn't. The look on his face was just plain torture. So I hurried to correct myself, but it was already too late.  
"So who do you want to take care of you forever?" he asked crossing his arms against his chest.  
"Jake, you know I didn't mean it like that!" I was mad now, he was pushing it a bit too far.  
"I'm pretty sure I heard it right, Bella!" he had the same tone and expression as me now.  
"Okay, how long are you going to keep this up for?" I asked taking one step closer to him.  
"What?" I could say he was faking it, but it actually did look like he was confused.  
"Doing this to me! The you verses Edward thing!" I was yelling but I didn't bother to try to keep it down. "you know it kills me when you do that!" I continued not feeling bad about one thing I had said or was about to say. "God, you're so selfish! Edward would never have done this to me!" I could see his eyes narrowing with that hurtful expression on his face, but at that point, I really didn't care.  
I was silent for a while and we stared at each other awkwardly.  
"So, are you ready to go?" he changed the whole subject and I was glad.  
"Let's go" I flashed a smile and he returned it. His smile was a lot happier and more convincing than mine. We were both just glad to have this conversation over with. We both just went inside the Rabbit as Jacob started driving.

On the way, we stopped by the gas station twice so I could go to the bathroom, and so Jacob could fill the car up. Then we stopped by a breakfast place about five kilometers from our hotel. Jacob said he wasn't hungry, and I ended up having a milkshake and chocolate and blueberry pancakes. They were the best pancakes I'd had in my life, and you could tell by the way I was eating them. When we left the restaurant, we went straight to the hotel to check in and put our suitcases away. Out hotel room was huge, it had 2 rooms, a small kitchen, and a bathroom. Only one of the bedrooms had a queen sized bed. The other just had a couch, a television, and a small dresser in the corner. Just when I unlocked the door to our suite, Jacob just put the suitcases on the floor and when straight to the bed and lay down smiling at me.  
"Jake, No!" I said as soon as I realized what he was doing. He just laughed.  
"What?" He said innocently as if having no idea whatsoever what was going on.  
"You know what Jake." I said sharply, being serious.  
"So you beg that bloodsucker," He put extra emphasis on bloodsucker. "but you don't even .." he continued as I cut him off.  
"Are we going back to that again?" I gave him a dirty look as I went into the bathroom to get ready to go over to Tanya's.  
"I just don't understand," he continued ignoring me but shouting louder so that I could hear him in the bathroom. "do you want to get hurt?" I could barely make out what he was saying over the running water, which I meant to do on purpose so that I wouldn't hear him and get upset, but it wasn't working, I could hear every word he was saying. "Because seriously, Bella, he could kill you!" I was getting really mad at that point, and as much as I tried to just ignore it, I couldn't help but yell back.  
"he would never do that!" I yelled in anger as I shut the water off and got out of the bathroom so that I could face him.  
"I never said he'd do it on purpose" he said smiling calmly.  
I just shook my head in disappointment and went to lie down on the couch. I turned to face the wall but I could hear Jacob's footsteps getting louder every step they took toward me. Then when they were too loud, they stopped and I knew he was standing right behind me. Then I could hear the squeak of his shoe as he bent down to get to my level. Then I felt Jacob's lips at my neck, soft and gentle. I wasn't responding, I just pretended to be asleep, but I didn't fool him. I could hear a slight chuckle, then he stopped and stood up. He brushed his warm fingers against my cheeks, and I couldn't help but turn and smile. How did he do that? I thought. I could never be mad at him, he had a magical touch. And I hated the fact that I couldn't be mad at him, it just made it easier to love him and harder to stay away. He lifted his hand for me to take to help me up, and just when I got up on my feet, he kissed me passionately with his hand running through my hair and the other around my waist pushing me even closer to him. It was hard to resist that kiss, so I didn't bother to try. I just put my arms around his neck and kissed him back. I pulled away just as soon as I remembered the reason why we were here.  
"I have to get dressed, are you changing or are you just coming like this?" I asked talking really fast now.  
"No, I'm just going like this, and you don't need to change, you already look great" he said with a grin  
"actually, you're right, this is my favorite, I think I'll just keep it on." I said smiling back. "So.. Are you ready to go?"  
He breathed in deeply letting out a sigh. "yea, let's go"

When in the car, Jacob's hands we stiff around the wheel, and I could guess why.  
"Are you nervous?" I asked already knowing the answer as well as the answer he was going to give me.  
"No, I'm fine" he answered a bit too quickly.  
"Swear?"  
"Sure, sure"  
I smiled, wishing I was the one who could read his mind to see what he was really thinking.  
As we got to a parking lot of one of the largest houses I'd ever seen, Jacob let in a deep breath and then sighed saying "We're here"  
I couldn't believe it! This is where he was staying this whole time. And now this was it, I was going to see him again. I was literally shaking until Jacob got hold of my hand and calmed me down.  
We went up to the front door to ring the doorbell, when before my hand even touched the doorbell, the door opened, and there he was. That perfect angel standing before me, those gorgeous eyes staring at me, that perfect smile flashing towards me, which was gone right when he switched his eyes to Jacob.  
"Edward!" I said in shock, even though I knew I was going to see him, I never pictured him again like this, though he hadn't changed, no matter how I saw him, it still wasn't as good as he looked now. "how did you…" I said in a confused tone.  
"Alice" he answered with a slight smile not taking his eyes off of me.  
Every time he looked at Jacob, he had that hurt look in his eyes, and though he was trying hard to hide it, I could still see through him.  
Still smiling at me, he stepped closer hugging me tightly. I would've given anything to have that moment last forever, but I could sense Jacob's eyes on him, watching him very carefully.


	3. Chapter 3 Tanya and Edward

It was 1:22 am, and I lay on my bed just staring at the white ceiling above me

"Come on in" Edward was mostly talking to me, but he looked at Jacob to try not to be rude.  
We went inside, and it was so much larger than it looked. The house was beautiful. It reminded me of Edward's house, but this one was so much more spaced out and just the living room was probably as big as my whole house. Coming from the kitchen to the living room to greet us was a beautiful blonde hazel eyed girl. She looked about my age and reminded me very much of Rosalie. I always hated looking so normal next to such amazingly beautiful creatures, I couldn't help but think of how ugly I must have looked to them.  
"You must be Bella!" The girl said in the softest sweetest voice.  
"And you must be Tanya" I said with a smile.  
"Yes, I'm guessing Edward has told you about me." she glanced over at Edward giving a look that was a bit too friendly. I didn't like it. "He has told me very much about you too," she continued "Must be very brave to befriend vampires huh?" she joked and I smiled politely.  
"Yes, she is" Edward cut in the conversation, flashing that crooked smile that I loved.  
I could tell Jacob didn't like the way Edward was looking at me, and from the corner of my eye I could see him giving Edward a dirty look.  
"So what brings you here?" Edward continued  
"Actually, Bella didn't want to come here, but I figured you hadn't seen her in a while…" Jacob put his arm around my waist pulling me tightly against him. And a hurtful expression crossed Edward's face.  
"I really missed you, Edward!" I said trying to rephrase what Jacob said "I just thought It'd be sort of weird with you, me, and Jake again" I said, but it looked like he wasn't paying attention to what I said as much as Jacob's arm around my waist right in front of him. I could tell he was getting jealous, and I could tell that Jacob liked it. I wanted to move Jacob's arm away, but I liked making him jealous in a way.  
"So, do you want to stay and I could order in your lunch?" Tanya asked hopeful. "Alice, Emmett, Jasper, and Rosalie are out hunting, they'll be back any minute now"  
"So why did you stay?" I asked already knowing the answer. Tanya was about to answer when Edward started.  
"Alice saw you coming, so I wanted to see you, and Tanya wanted to meet you" he gave me that look he always gave me. That 'you're my life now' look. And I could feel my heart pounding harder and blood flushing through my veins. "Don't worry we went last night. We're not hungry, you don't have to be scared" he said it jokingly, but I still didn't want him thinking that I would ever be scared of him.  
"I would never be scared of you, Edward" and just when I said it, I could feel Jacob's arm tighten around my waist to the point where it almost hurt. And Edward's hands clenched into fists at his sides, he tried putting them behind his back so that I couldn't tell how frustrated he was. Maybe it was a bad idea coming here with Jacob. Maybe it was a bad idea coming here at all. I was about to go up to him, and just put my arms around him to calm him down, when Tanya walked slowly and put arms around him, and his hands relaxed. I hated admitting it, but I understood what Edward had said about jealously hurting that much. I'd never been that jealous -- he told be about Tanya having feelings for him, but he said he didn't feel the same way-- whatever happened to him preferring brunettes! At that moment not realizing what I was doing, grabbed Jacob's hand, and I could sense Jacob grinning.  
"Sure, we actually checked into a hotel for 3 nights…." before I could finish, Edward cut me off.  
"How many rooms?" he asked in a serious tone.  
" just one" Jacob answered before I could.  
"Actually," I started to protest. "There are 2 rooms, one of them has a queen sized bed, and the other has a couch… so we could probably take turns" I was talking really quickly to remove that hurt look from Edward's face, and it worked, but it transferred right to Jacob's face. I couldn't believe it. There was no way to make them both happy at the same time.  
"Why would we sleep on the couch, when a bed could fit both of us" Jacob turned to look at me, grinning to make Edward as jealous as possible. I just shrugged not knowing what to say, and that hurt expression transferred back to Edward's face.  
"Edward, do you know where the nearest pizza place is?" Tanya changed the subject completely.  
"yea, there's one around the corner, I think they deliver. Look them up in the phone book" Edward answered, still looking at me with that same look.  
As Tanya was dialing, Edward invited us to sit down. I sat and Jacob took the seat beside me quickly before Edward could, and Edward just flashed a sarcastic smile and took a seat on the arm of the couch on my other side. Jacob returned the sarcastic grin. It was getting a bit awkward so I decided to turn the television on and distract them, even though it was probably impossible no matter that I did. So to my luck, I was flipping through the movie viewings to find Romeo and Juliet on. Edward grabbed the remote from my hand and set it on that channel. I could see what he was trying to do. I gave him a look of apology and sympathy, and Jacob cut in.  
"So…" Jacob started out. "are you and Tanya…?" he continued not feeling rude about invading their privacy at all.  
Edward kept silent. And Tanya stepped toward him to put her arms around his shoulders.  
"It's not really official because we don't want to make a big deal out if it yet, but I'd say we're a bit more than friends" She flashed a smile at Edward who returned it politely. I gave Edward a look that was a mixture of anger, disappointment, and hurt. But then I realized that I really didn't have a right to do that. I was with Jacob, did I really expect him to wait for me till the end of time?  
"Oh" was all I could say back. Then I shot a smile at Tanya.  
The doorbell rang right then, it was the pizza delivery. And just when Tanya was about to close the door, she saw Alice's car in the driveway. When the car turned off, Alice was out of the car first with jasper, and Rosalie and Emmett right behind them.  
"Bella!" Alice ran, or danced toward me to hug me. I don't think I could ever get used to the way she moved, it was like a ballerina angel.  
"Alice! Oh, I missed you so much!" I said hugging her back. From the corner of my eye I could see Edward with that look still on his face. Watching my every move. But I didn't understand it! Shouldn't I be the one mad at him? He promised that he'd never leave me, whether it was good or bad for me. And he still left! And now it was my turn to hurt him! I didn't want to do it, but he was pretty much asking for it! He was trying to make me jealous not knowing that I could easily do the same.

We talked for a while got to know what everyone was up to. Every now and then, Jacob slipped a kiss in front of Edward when he knew he was watching me. I let him, I could see what it did to him, I could feel his hurt too, but I wanted him to feel how much he hurt me too, and this was just a small part of it, not even a real comparison.  
It got late and Jacob and I went back to our hotel.  
"Come on, Bells, you're not actually going to sleep on the couch are you?" he asked in a tone that almost made me feel bad for him.  
"I wont if you don't do anything.." I answered with a hint in my voice to let him know what I was talking about.  
"Like what?" he asked giving me a confused look, but with a smile that gave him away. "Okay, fine, just sleep next to me" he said lying down on the bed. I didn't know whether to believe him or not, but something in his voice made me trust him. So I went to lie down on the bed beside him. His lips brushed against mine slightly, then I pulled away.  
"Jake!" I pretty much yelled.  
"I love you, Bella" he said in the sweetest tone kissing me again, completely ignoring the fact that I pulled away. This time I kissed him back though. I almost melted every time he said he loved me, I could resist.  
"I love you too" I whispered back. I kissed him once more, then he went to sleep, and I was glad. I thought the 'I love you' thing was just a way to get me to give him what he wanted.  
I couldn't sleep. My eyes shut for about five minutes, then I opened them again. I saw a white face against the dark room staring at me. That beautiful face that I would recognize anywhere.  
"Edward?" I whispered low enough not to wake Jacob up.  
He didn't answer, his eyes were narrowed staring at Jacob's arm tightly wrapped around me.  
"How did you get in?" I asked, which I then realized was the stupidest thing to say.  
His eyes didn't move away from me, but his head pointed toward an open window.


	4. Chapter 4 Jealousy

It was 1:22 am, and I lay on my bed just staring at the white ceiling above me

"Edward, what are you doing here?" I asked in a criticizing tone, but I didn't want him to leave.  
"Watching you talk in your sleep, as always." he said flashing that beautiful crooked smile I loved. "Since I don't know what's going on through you're head, this is the only way to really know what you're thinking" he admitted.  
"What I'm thinking about what?"  
"Me, Tanya, that…." he was struggling with the name, so he ended up using the term "pup". It was better than calling him dog, or so I thought. I guess they were the same. I decided to ignore that.  
"Ok, I'll just tell you what I'm thinking straight out, I wont edit or anything…" I said confidently  
His face lightened up and he flashed another smile showing his perfect teeth.  
"I thought you said you weren't into blondes…" I said as he cut me off  
"I…" Then I cut him off again.  
"I also thought you said that I was the only one you would ever love"  
"Bella…" he started to talk but I cut him off again  
"I came all the way to see you and you're with her?!" I was louder now, but still whispering.  
"Bella!" He screamed, and it was loud enough to wake Jacob up.  
"what are you doing here?" Jacob asked confused like he thought he was dreaming or something.  
"Go back to sleep pup" Edward answered rudely.  
"Edward!" yelled giving him the hint of why I yelled his name.  
"Look, can I talk to you in the other room?" Edward asked me, his voice calmer and quieter now.  
"Unlike you, she needs her sleep," Jacob answered before I could. "go back to where you came from bloodsucking…" he didn't continue.  
"Bella?" Edward looked at me, completely ignoring Jacob.  
"Fine" I said getting up and heading to the other room. Edward already beat me there and shut the door so that Jacob couldn't hear us.  
"Bella, how can you think that?" he was speaking with an angry tone.  
"What?" I answered loudly, narrowing my eyes into a dirty look.  
"How can you possibly think that she could mean the same to me as you do?"  
"Who, Tanya?" I still had that same look on my face.  
He was silent and I realized what that meant.  
"Why didn't you let me know that in front of her?" I asked anxious for his answer.  
"I didn't want to look like an idiot tell you that I was still in love with while you were holding that…." he paused to relax. "that DOG'S hand" he was mad now, yelling really loud, I was sure Jacob could hear him.  
"Edward, you told me to be with him!"  
"how many times have I told you not to overestimate my self-control because of selfish I am. I want you to be safe and happy, and normal. But how can you just leave me like that?!"  
"You told me to!" I was yelling really loud now.  
"Bella! Are you even listened to me?" he screamed in an angry tone, no actually a slow screaming tone, the kind you use with someone you know is retarded.  
"What?" I screamed. "what do you.." I was in the middle of my sentence, when he cut me off pressing his lips to mine hard at first, but then it got softer. Why was I letting him kiss me? As soon as I remembered Jacob being in the other room, I pulled away from him to see that hurt look in his eyes.  
"I'm too late" he said. It wasn't a question .  
I didn't say anything, I just started at him.  
"Bella, why did you come here?" his voice was suddenly really quiet now.  
"Jacob said it would be easier to find out who I was truly in love with, and then I saw you with Tanya, and .." I could feel tears running down my face. "and you knew what I thought, why did you do that?"  
He smiled, wiping my tears away with his thumb. "I wanted you to feel one tenth of the pain of jealousy, Bella"  
"So you meant to hurt me?" I shook my head in disappointment.  
"no, I meant to show you how I felt about you. You wouldn't bother to hurt someone unless you love them"  
He grabbed my face in his hands, looking straight into my eyes. "I'm going to tell you right now, for the future, incase you care…" he was smiling while saying this. "No girl would ever mean anything to me, no girl at all. This feeling I have, you only have it once in your life. I'm trying to protect you as much as possible, but I'm hurting myself doing so, and I'm going to repeat this for about the hundredth time, I'm more selfish than you can imagine, I'd rather you weren't safe and here with me than being safe and with that wolf" he had another name for him now.  
He bent down to kiss my forehead and I let my head lay against his shoulder.  
Then he suddenly pulled away.  
"What?" I asked  
"did you sleep with him?" he asked seriously  
"Edward!" I yelled  
"what am I supposed to think? I come in and see you both in the same bed with his arm around you. By the way, you smell like a dog, love." he added changing the subject at the last part.  
"Great.." I answered and heard Edward chuckle.  
Then I heard a hard knock on the door.  
"Bella?! What's he doing to you? Want me to call the police?" Jacob's voice sounded serious even though I knew he said just to hurt Edward. But apparently it didn't work, Edward just smiled and shook his head.  
"Jake, cut it out!"  
I opened the door, and Jacob came in.  
" So, you made up your mind yet?" Jacob asked, and they were both staring at me.


	5. Chapter 5 Make a choise

It was 1:22 am, and I lay on my bed just staring at the white ceiling above me

"What?"  
"Who do you choose? Some who would protect you, someone who could let you have a normal life, who could do things with you the other can't… at least not without killing you that is." Jacob flashed a smile.  
"Jake!"  
"No, I couldn't have said it better myself. But you know…pup, in the end, the feeling is all that matters. When you truly love someone, you would sacrifice anything for them, including your life." He paused to smile at me, and Jacob rolled his eyes. "Of course, I'm not saying that I ever will hurt you, I really hope you know that" he continued.  
"No, I know you wont hurt me, that's the thing, your too delicate and careful with me…"  
"In a bad way" Jacob added cutting me off  
"No, not in a bad way, but.."  
"Yes in a bad way" Jacob cut me off again.  
"can you tell the pup to shut his mouth?!" Edward was mad, yelling at him now.  
"Jake, can you step out for just a second?" I asked politely.  
As Jacob got out of the room, I stepped closer to Edward.  
"Edward, it's just that…" I was trying to find the right words to say. "I want you. In every way. I wouldn't love anyone else the same way, and no matter who I'm with, there's always going to be that hole in me that wont be filled without you. That piece that makes me whole." I was starting to sound cheesy and stupid, but I kept going anyway. "I just don't want you to be too careful with me. I know I'm not as strong as you, but I'm stronger than you give me credit for" I smiled.  
"don't confuse strength with bravery, Bella" he said in a serious tone. "it would kill me if anything happened to you, whether it was my fault or yours or that dog's." his voice was calm but I could sense anger in his voice. "just tell me one thing, and don't tell me what I want to hear, I want you to tell me the truth."  
"Okay.. What?"  
"Do you .." he paused to take a deep breath. "do you still feel the same way about me as you did before… him.." I could tell this wasn't easy for him to say.  
"my feelings for you haven't changed at all, and they most likely never will." I admitted  
"Bella…." his voice was a whisper, and he didn't continue what he was going to say.  
He bent down and kissed me, our lips were moving together, and I didn't pull back this time.  
"made up your choice yet?" he asked with a smile as he pulled away.  
"I think so…" I said smiling back.


End file.
